N U R S A F I A H

Wednesday, May 03, 2006/

what am i doing??? @ 6:25 pm

My cousin, Muhammad Faris Hezan Bin J was in the hospital recently due to unidentified sickness. He was reported shivering while in the crib. My auntie was seen worried sick and my uncle, at a loss of what to do. Thus, my uncle's family who are much more experienced with handling babies for example his mother who is my grandmother and my mother and my other auntie has lended their helping hand. I pray to Allah that the baby will get healthy and strong. Insyaallah. Amin

For you, Nur, it's never really been all about the cottage at the beach, a multimillion dollar bank account and the adoration of fans, has it?

Ok, a teeny, tiny bit.

Instead, it's been about having a life that allows for the expression of your creativity and exchanging your rare and special gifts with the world. To be yourself, no matter the cost, laughing often, and knowing to your core the meaning of love, friendship and sleeping in.

Just wanted you to know that I know this about you. And that I think it's just great how you're imagining the latter when you visualize these days...

Pretty much got you pegged, huh?
The Universe

Haiz. I cant help thinking that in all this troubled ordeals, I have grown up. I realised that people won't wait for you. They wont see how you have aged from within.

So you have got to show them. But that does not mean that you take up all responsibilities until you cannot handle everything.

When you are hungry you eat. Similarly, when you are in trouble seek out for help. Don't try to be the superhero that you think you are. You are not. We are just mere humans.

Still, is it worth getting trust and responsibility and experience without the recognition? Is it worth it sacrificing your time, brain and heart for nothing but experience? Is it fair that others may pile you up with all the work but the only time when you will benefit from it is when you do start working? Is it justifiable that you have the same name but you give in more? You care more?

Why do I care so much? Again and again I ask this question. Why must you have the initiative when others let the boss do all the job. I think these people are smart. If you dont get the money for it, then why do it? Still...isn't it better to do the best that you can?

So what is it?
Work only when you get incentive
OR
Work the best that you can. Everytime. Even when you have too many things to do that you can't cope.

My friends, if you were me, what in the world would you choose? Because I am truly confused.

I dont know....
I do not envy.

a lyfe* like mine-; 6:25 pm