Integrating myself into the Malay community back again since 2 years of being out of MLDDS in Cedar. I think, if you find the right type of friends ( for me, it's the enthu-siastic/makcik/kentalans type of ppl) you'll find yourself happy no matter where you go. You just got to identify these people. I'm all okay for the people who really are into following the latest teen trends right down to the skinny jeans and thick mascara but if you don't gel, you just don't right?
Anyhoos more details on my PAE Orientation: I was in Dynosius 15 Family, my OGL is ZIZIE who is also our Family Head. She's really nice (:. The friends I made in Dynosius are Trudy, Marie, Hazim, Yong Liang, JAcky and Farhana. I think, Trudy, Marie and me are quite bonded...and Hazim is like an extra everytime the Student Council Head does the bird call. And then Trudy will ask Hazim to repeat it but louder. Trudy is the most enthu in my group. My other OGLs are Lester and umm....can't remember the rest. I'm in the same family as Amira, Fateha and Atiqah. Husna, Maisarah, Nikita and Syafiqah were in Hera. Syah was in Aphrodite. There were a LOT of ex-gongshangers: Nabilah, Siti Safiyah,Chek Kai, Shermaine, Daniel Neo, Azeemah and I think Loretta Neo was posted there but she didn't register. The families had allies and Dynosius was allies with Aphrodite and Hercules. The families were named after Greek Gods and Godesses. Ex-Cedarians there were: Arini, Raudha, Murni, Afiqah. My ex-madrasah(pri) friend, Atikah Syarah is in J2 there too. Ex-madrasah friend(sec) is Atiqah Luqman.
We had just subject lectures for a week. This week, we started on tutorials. My physics/civics tutor is Mr Sum. Tara says he's a national dancer...you know like for dancesports. He's one of the fun teachers. Thank goodness for that. I just had my first KI period just now and I must admit that I feel very intimidated by the students and the teacher because she didn't let me finish my sentence so she took it wrongly...she cut in and said "You are wrong there". And she didn't even let me finish my argument! Arghh...i was real pissed about that. Now we have homework and the first assignment is about looking around and observing things around you, and then asking about, and then sharing this experience on Friday. I feel like being in IN Crowd again. And by next Monday, I have to complete a 600-800 word essay on "How I Gain Knowledge". Now I think about it, 600 words ain't that long. I'll manage. I'd rather write essays than go around for an unspecific assignment. I have a small fear about confronting strangers. However, once I get over this, I find myself able to strike up a nice conversation with them. BUT I don't know what to do! I have no idea! And for Malay Lit, I'm supposed to find out how Singapore was founded. Plus physics tutorial, I have 4 to-dos now. Haiz...
Last Saturday, I also went for MLEP Orientation. HAha...it was fun enough. I went to Temasek Poly with Marliyana and her sister, Julia after that and bumped into Filzah, Geraldine and Shahini there.
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8:14 pm
Taken in my room on my bed. Ilhan loves my room. He quiets down when in a tantrum. N plays with my curtain. And graduation Caesar wreath. N my parrot finger puppet- bookmark-study buddy given to me by ms lizah for studying during prelims. Basically all things colourful.;
8:05 pm
I think because of the fact that no one has really advertised what TPJC is like, I did not expect much of it and maybe because of that, I am starting to enjoy it. Still I really want to go to TJC. TPJC is not bad because of the people I know there, in J2 and j1. All the friends I haven't seen for a long time...some have changed extremely and some have not. I really misssed talking to Atikah Syarah. I realised this when I talked to her....She listens like a good friend should...and you can tell it's from the heart...not like only half of it cares. That is what I really needed. I told the bad news to 5 people and 3 people responded in accordance to how I wanted them to. N the other one, I think I told her at a bad time so she could'nt really advise me. So I think...that's allright. Time really heals you...and when you look back, you see things from a different perspective...You come up with new theories.
So should I be glad that my feelings were not known? What happens when a confession is made and your jaw shakes like mad, something you've never experienced before, and when it's done, you know you feel something but you can't let it out because you don't know if it is appropriate. Everyone asks if I if told the other party my feelings but that's my problem always isn't it...I never do let anyone know what my feelings are...even if they hurt me like crazy. I let other people know...but the one who should ACTUALLY know, is kept in ignorance. I always ask myself if this is my biggest downfall...that I keep the essential in. What do you think happens when you look at an old friend but the soul is that of a stranger. Who is this person? Where is that person who you loved. Who said we would be friends forever. Who said that they'll love us forever. Forever is a promise that can never be kept...because forever ends. Now or later. Even for a short period of time, forever is forgotten. Now that won't be forever anymore will it. Cos it was broken. Even for a moment.
He's gone.
She's drifted away.
I see strangers in my eyes, wearing the mask of yesterday's faces.
They say giving is better than receiving...but what if all you do is give and give....and give and give...and you don't receive anything. Not even kindness when it matters the most, when you need it the most. You don't receive a connection between the eyes, the hearts, the souls. No smile, no warmth, no understanding. He's distracted, she's busy busy busy. And *POOF* all is lost.
Maybe the timing's not right, but when is it? Time is always short and I certainly have no time to wait... there are so many things to do on Earth! Hence, if you do not make the effort, you will be forgotten. If you don't respond to my invitation, I'm not knocking on your door with a horse-pulled carriage. If you can't remember me, why on Earth would I want to remember you?
New friends I have made. And I think Dynosius 15 is really the most united group because we stood through all the normal I-want-to-be-with-my-own-cliques-from-my-own-schools test. ahahah..Although I won't deny that I am hanging a lot with my own kind lately. But it's not that I'm not making a n effort to know other people. Trudy, Marie and Hazim...and now Syahidah...yay! you ppl rock for first friendships in JC. Thanks for being willing to mix around and hang around with each other. I hope we'll still include ourselves in our lives.
Some old friends I think...have ceased to be my friends...and I am surprised to see that my heart actually knew that it was too far gone to be fixed because it's not feeling the lost. I think I can safely say now, GOODBYE PAST!
TPJC's canteen has got to be the best canteen is all the JC world. The architecture, enviroment design and the FOOD.....oh wow the food...where can I even begin...I am a person who cannot, ABSOLUTELY cannot eat the same food over and over again everyday. And thus, none can fault me when I say that TPJC is one of the best in terms of variety of food....oh wow...absolute GOLD AWARD.
My subject combination is uniquely weird, people say: H2 Maths, Physics and Malay Literature, H1 China Studies and Knowledge and Inquiry. WOW.. hahah I can't wait for Monday's first real KI tutorial/lecture....I'm trying out Physics and Malay Lit for the first intake. If I hate it, I'll change to Econs and History. See how it goes. ...and I got into Guitar Ensemble at TPJC, renowned for winning Gold, in it's first SYF central judging and Gold with Honours on the 2nd. I won't say that I hate it if I stay there. Everything would be taken care of...transport...free! Equals more studying time which I desperately need. And more time for CCA? haha. Then I will be well balanced in both areas. And to finish KI essay. However, programmes in other "better" will be better right? Cos they're more funded?
For now, it's just btw TPJC and TJC. Maybe MJC...after considering seriously... As in, I don't think I'll fit there. VJ is too far I think....even though it is quite acceptable but I just don't want....
to be surrounded by clever people who make me feel so dumb. hhahah. I know, I know I'm clever in my own way. Well now when I think of it...I'm a lot of smarts...haha like smarties! But I prefer M&Ms. How?? hahah
Oh and I can blog pictures from my handphone now...using my new W910i Sony Erricson. love it. I feel like XOXO Gossip Girl...one of my fav tv shows. I seriously hope Maisarah and Felina are wrong and that the Writers Strike doesn't affect this show....I GET IT ALREADY HOW IMPORTANT YOU ALL ARE!!! COME BACK!!!! PLEASE!!!
Wei Zhong called during his internship office hours.
Hey, I'm going to ask you something
Orite. Shoot.
Do you care about the US elections?
No. Not really. Actually just a bit. I can't participate so heck care what goes on in US. The only people I support are Hilary Clinton and Barack Obama...cos he's hot ( omgosh, I can't believe I just said that! Must be because of those youtube vids)
Ok. Haha...
Why do you think George Bush isn't running this time round...
Cos he *****. TOOTs.
Do you know if Barack Obama comes from the Republican party or the Democrats
[ don't rmb what I said here but I got it wrong]
Do you know how Hilary Clinton and Bill Clinton are related?
Duh! who doesn't know? They're husband and wife.
how many parties are running for elections?
You just told me! Democrats and Republicans.
Correct. Haha
Who won the state of Iowa?
I don't know but I'm going to guess...Barack Obama?
Correct.
Woo hoo!
Ok thanks Safiah...
Right.
Now I'm thinking...i really want Barack Obama to win. Syahidah ah...convinced me.
Labels: IN CROWD, innermost thoughts, PAE, TPJC, US politics
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6:54 pm
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12:16 am
Doesnt it look like gongshang now tt u think abt it?;
12:15 am
Me, Muu and Marli returned to the new old Cedar which is so near Amira's house. Me n marli took $30 borders vouchers. Woohoo! M rich. Hahaha. Then we ate prata at the indian muslim stall. I had mushroom cheese n muu had a plain n egg. We both had milo blended shake. Marli had a milo godzilla only. Not bad. Cedar now is really a neighbourhood sch.
I really missed them so we took the longest bus ride home. 107 change to 8. We passed by pp macs, macherpeson rd. All memories of 23 bus. Haha. I think the nxt time i c them will be results day. Aaah! Scary!;
12:11 am
